Unfinished Lives

Remembering LGBT Hate Crime Victims

Kobe Bryant Fined $100K For Anti-Gay Slur: A Special Comment

Los Angeles, California – Kobe Bryant, controversial star of the Los Angeles Lakers, has been fined $100,000 for an anti-gay slur he mouthed on live television at a referee.  As E! Online reports, the National Basketball Association (NBA) fined Bryant after investigating the incident.  Bryant, angry at being given a technical foul by Referee Bennie Adams, called the ref a “fucking faggot” in such a way that it was captured live by the camera at last night’s Lakers game with the San Antonio Spurs. NBA Commissioner David Stern swiftly disciplined the five-time national champion guard, saying to Free Republic, ”Kobe Bryant’s comment during last night’s game was offensive and inexcusable. While I’m fully aware that basketball is an emotional game, such a distasteful term should never be tolerated. … Kobe and everyone associated with the NBA know that insensitive or derogatory comments are not acceptable and have no place in our game or society.” The action of the NBA drew praise from LGBTQ rights advocacy groups who had protested the use of the slur.  In a statement Bryant issued through the L.A. Lakers organization, Bryant had tried to defuse the anger of gay rights groups by saying that he didn’t mean anything by it. “What I said last night should not be taken literally. My actions were out of frustration during the heat of the game, period,” Bryant averred. ”The words expressed do NOT reflect my feelings towards the gay and lesbian communities and were NOT meant to offend anyone.” Who does he think he’s fooling? The Human Rights Campaign said to TMZ Sports, “What a disgrace for Kobe Bryant to use such horribly offensive and distasteful language, especially when millions of people are watching.” The HRC has a point.  Language has consequences. Words can ignite lethal acts. Especially for groups who face threats of physical, social, and spiritual violence daily, as LGBTQ people do. The people who say to queer folk, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me,” simply do not live in the same psycho-social universe that the rest of us do. The linkage between anti-gay slurs and epithets, and acts of bias-driven violence has been well-establshed by law enforcement. One of the unmistakable markers looked for by the Federal Bureau of Investigation to help determine if an assault should be investigated as a hate crime is the use of derogatory, anti-LGBTQ language during the committal of the crime. And the link between verbal attacks on queer folk and hate speech is clearly an organic one. Bryant’s disdain for gays and lesbians was openly on display for the world to see and hear, reinforcing cultural and religious bias against gender variant and same sex loving people.  HRC went on to say, “Hopefully Mr. Bryant will recognize that as a person with such fame and influence, the use of such language not only offends millions of LGBT [lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender] people around the world, but also perpetuates a culture of discrimination and hate that all of us, most notably Mr. Bryant, should be working to eradicate.” Youth worship NBA stars like Bryant.  They model themselves after their heroes in fashion, prowess, and, pertinent for this inquiry, in opinion. The sports shoe industry has know that for a very long time. At the very least, Bryant’s verbal foul supports a culture of discrimination and intimidation that has kept gay and lesbian athletes deeply closeted for decades, making the sports closet arguably the most pernicious in American life today.  One has only to reflect on the rarest of all queer celebrities: out professional sports figures. So, the Unfinished Lives Project Team stands with HRC President, Joe Solmonese when he said today, “We applaud Commissioner Stern and the NBA for not only fining Bryant but for recognizing that slurs and derogatory comments have no place on the basketball court or in society at large. We hope such swift and decisive action will send a strong and universal message that this kind of hateful outburst is simply inexcusable no matter what the context.” It is past time to require professional sports teams and coaching organizations to do sensitivity and diversity training inclusive of LGBTQ concerns. Kobe Bryant apparently doesn’t know better until he gets caught.  The Lakers went on to win the game.  Kobe lost, big time. We at Unfinished Lives believe in order for things to get better in the locker room and on the court, athletes must be taught what is at stake when they “foul” the air.

April 14, 2011 Posted by | African Americans, Anti-LGBT hate crime, anti-LGBT hate crime murder, California, FBI, gay bashing, gay men, gender identity/expression, Gender Variant Youth, harassment, Hate Crimes, hate crimes prevention, hate speech, Heterosexism and homophobia, Human Rights Campaign, Kobe Bryant, Lesbian women, National Basketball Association (NBA), Perpetrators of Hate Crime, Queer, religious hate speech, religious intolerance, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, Slurs and epithets, Social Justice Advocacy, Special Comments, transgender persons, transphobia | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on Kobe Bryant Fined $100K For Anti-Gay Slur: A Special Comment

“It Gets Better” Makes Us All Stronger! A Special Comment by Dr. Stephen Sprinkle

Dr. Stephen Sprinkle and Dan Savage (Unfinished Lives Project Director, Dr.Sprinkle, was an early contributor to the "It Gets Better Project").

When Dan Savage and Terry Miller conceived of the “It Gets Better Project,” the goal they had was a hundred videos.  Now there are over 10,000 of them, and the videos have been viewed over 40,000,000 times to date—and growing!  Dan has said that had there been 20 videos online, and one life saved, it would have been worth it.  We know now that many, many teenage lives have been given new hope, and also that young lives by the hundreds have been saved by this visionary project.  As the Jewish Talmud teaches, “Whoever destroys a soul, it is considered as if he destroyed an entire world. And whoever saves a life, it is considered as if he saved an entire world” (Mishnah Sanhedrin 4:5; Babylonian Talmud Tractate Sanhedrin 37a).  The IGB Project, and now the New York Times bestselling book by the same name has already saved a galaxy of worlds by this rabbinic measure.

But the IGB project and book have gone one better than this, if such a thing might be possible.  Dan, Terry, and the worldwide host of contributors to this positive effort have changed the world irrevocably, queer and straight alike.  Here are two of the ways I see.

First, the “coming out story,” a staple of LGBTQ life, has been transformed into a declaration of how the queer community is overcoming shame, persecution, and victimhood—and coming on strong.  For two generations since Stonewall, the coming out story has been a way LGBTQ people shared their struggles and established solidarity with each other.  Most of these stories were accounts of struggle, hurt, and survival. Queer folk got to see they were not alone and isolated—we heard the battles others fought, and compared scars—and that was powerful for all parties, because these stories allowed us to see that there were others like us in this difficult world—that we resisted and lived on into a new life together, no longer alone.  But IGB went a crucial step further: as thousands of us were empowered to speak directly to queer teenagers with a positive message of hope and power, “It really does get better, and this is how it got better for us,” we got to overhear ourselves rehearsing stories of strength and success—not just repetitions of woe and endurance.  IGB powered up the queer community to tell the whole world how we are defeating opposition in fine style thousands of different ways everyday.  The message is, “We are no one’s patsies anymore, thank you! And we are ready and able to make things improve for ourselves and our teens every day, until it gets better for all of us!”  IGB changed the coming out story into the overcoming stories of a powerful queer people who will never settle for victimhood again.  In my religious tradition, as a queer Baptist preacher, that makes me want to shout, Hallelujah!

Second, IGB empowered our straight allies to come out strong, too.  From President Obama to Secretary of State Hillary Clinton.  From Prime Minister David Cameron to Lutheran Presiding Bishop Mark Hanson. From moms and pops, school teachers who taught us, and straight employers who hired us.  Our allies joined the queer community to make the message of zero tolerance for school bullying perfectly queer.  I know the term “queer” rankles some genteel sentiments, but to see the way our straight allies have taken the term and wrapped themselves in it for our sakes should dispel the last reservations we have about the word and about how the LGBTQ movement for human rights and equal dignity will grow and eventually prevail.  Straight queer allies by the hundreds of thousands are rising up against bullying, het privilege, and the culture of violence that imperils not only gender non-conforming youth, but all youth everywhere.  By ourselves, LGBTQ people are not numerous enough to change the het world.  But IGB shows youth and adults in our LGBTQ communities—out or closeted—that growing numbers of queerly empowered straight allies are joining us to transform the world we all share.  This is no panacea, of course.  My generation may not live to see it, especially in the churches, synagogues, temples, and mosques where old prejudices linger with desperate power.  But even there, straight allies are queering religion with us.  When the annals of these years are written, I believe the IGB Project will feature prominently in the story of how all us queers, LGBTQ and straight, overcame together. Like the Black Gospel refrain goes, “Over! Over! My soul looks back and wonders how I got over!”

So, Dan and Terry, and the tens of thousands who have rallied to the cause of a safer world for youth to grow up in, a salute to you!  The children will rise up to call you “blessed.”  And so does this mighty queer Baptist preacher from Texas, too!    ~ Stephen V. Sprinkle, Brite Divinity School, and Unfinished Lives Project Director

April 3, 2011 Posted by | African Americans, Anglo Americans, Anti-LGBT hate crime, Bisexual persons, Bullying in schools, Dan Savage, gay bashing, gay men, gay teens, gender identity/expression, Gender Variant Youth, harassment, Hate Crimes, hate crimes prevention, Heterosexism and homophobia, It Gets Better Book, It Gets Better Project, It Gets Better Project (IGBP), Latino and Latina Americans, Latinos, Lesbian women, LGBT teen suicide prevention, LGBTQ suicide, Popular Culture, religious hate speech, religious intolerance, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, Slurs and epithets, Social Justice Advocacy, Special Comments, Stonewall Inn, transgender persons, transphobia | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on “It Gets Better” Makes Us All Stronger! A Special Comment by Dr. Stephen Sprinkle

   

%d bloggers like this: